I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
