Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
