smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Everclear isn't food dammit
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize