Pappa wants mamma naked
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
