people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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