Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
