Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize