It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize