i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
