I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
