New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
