Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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