just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
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