in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
