I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
