So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
