I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
