if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize