gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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