I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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