I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
