We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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