I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize