dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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