i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
