you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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