Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize