I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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