well you can't waste a boner
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
