he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
