I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
