Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
