does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I touched a dick in church today
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
