his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
