i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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