I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize