can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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