It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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