We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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