so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I have already put on my inside pants.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
