So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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