i just google imaged poop.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
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