i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize