I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
