if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
