I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
