My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
You need a sexual gate keeper
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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