The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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