she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
