there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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