can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I would fuck him just for his dog
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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