im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
